I walked into the middle school yard in full fight-or-flight mode. My body wanted to bolt, wanted to dive into the bushes to hide from the snipers doubtless surrouding the compound, but I kept walking towards the classrooms.

"You are such a pansy," I thought to myself. That wasn't a productive thought.

"They can smell fear." That got my attention.

"Start smiling, and keep smiling until you actually feel happy." I did what I could with my facial muscles, with mixed results.

I couldn't find "the teacher," so I waited in the office of some guy who might be the principal. I really haven't been tracking these things. I know them by recognition, not name: "the teacher," "the school," "the other teacher, the one who doesn't speak much english," "the bratty kid," "the smartass kid," "the woeful-looking kid," "the guy who might be the principal." I was a little relieved not to see "the teacher," because after making a big fuss last week and arranging for weekly Monday meetings with her to discuss and plan, I completely forgot this week and stood her up. Oops. Maybe she was home sick yesterday and today.

Class went better than last week. I stuck to a fairly simple plan. Question and Answer. Repeat after me. Question and Answer. New word. Repeat after me. You, you, and you come up to the front and practice the dialog. You there, Why are you talking? Please repeat the dialog. Sit down. Question and Answer. That went fairly well.

The second class was more unruly. I think they smelled blood in the water from last week. I tried very hard to maintain an even keel. I stuck to the plan, and things went acceptably well. The volume level kept creeping up, and at the end I was really just running out the clock, but I never lost control of the classroom.

Next week, I may offer as a carrot for good behavior: English names.

Weekend on the Bus

I have plenty of notes from the weekend, which I'll type up later. Executive Summary: would have been a vaguely pleasent vacation if any of us were in the mood; my grouchiness didn't help anything. Lowlights include about 8 hours of bus time (for a two day, one night vacation); going on a river ride and getting soaked repeatedly by yahoos in the rubber rafts who thought it a hoot to splash the people in the wooden boats, gauntlet-style; fairly unsanitary conditions most of the time, for which my stomach exacted a price yesterday and today; and some ... interesting characters. Highlights included a lake, a waterfall, and a river ride.

I drafted a letter to my Senators and Representative, which I include here. Feel free to copy any part you find useful. It got me to thinking, is writing my congressman enough? Is calling enough? Can I be doing more? Then I did a reality check. Usually when I do a reality check, it's very depressing:

"Reality Check: you just wasted at least three quarters of a $100,000 education.

"Reality Check: the focus of your life for the last six years has been a sequence of jobs for meaningless companies that have since ceased to exist;

"Reality Check: you're twenty six years old and every bit as emotionally mature concerning women as when you were seventeen."

But today, it went like this:

"Reality Check: While millions of Americans yammer on talk radio, you're in China teaching American culture to dozens or hundreds of bright young kids who maybe just maybe as a result won't fly hijacked airplanes into skyscrapers."

Letter to My Federal Representatives

Patty Murray, Senator, WA, senator_murray@murray.senate.gov Maria Cantwell, Senator, WA, via http://cantwell.senate.gov/contact/ Jim McDermott, Representative, WA 7th District, via http://www.house.gov/writerep/

My name is Joel Aufrecht. I am a citizen of the United States of America, born in Los Angeles. I am living and teaching English in Guilin, China. I am registered to vote in Seattle, Washington. I have voted in every city, state, and federal general election since age 18.

I called your Washington, DC office on the morning of 18 Sep 2001 to ask about your positions on current issues, and to express my opinions. This email offers more details and some references. I hope this is helpful as you face difficult votes in the days ahead.

[McDermott: The staff member I spoke to had in recent years himself travelled to China to teach English. I would be delighted to compare our experiences, and to hear more about Rep. McDermott's visit to China.]

I am writing to ask you to keep in mind the following questions when voting on legislation:

1. Will this bill do permanent damage to our civil liberties, and thus to our security from tyranny?

2. Will this bill support or endorse terrorism?

3. Will this bill perpetuate a cycle of violence?

In the days since the 11 Sep 2001 terrorist attack, several Congressional actions have already failed these tests. HR 2500, passed 13 Sep, expands federal wiretap authority. John Negroponte's nomination to UN Representative was approved by a Senate committee without investigation of allegations that he was party to human rights abuses as Ambassador to Honduras between 1981 and 1985.

1. Civil Liberties

I support the ideals of the United States of America, as embodied in the Constitution, the Bill of Rights, and the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. I don't know whether those who attacked the United States on 11 Sep 2001 were inspired by hatred of our ideals, or hatred for those American actions that fall short of those ideals. In neither case can we defend those ideals by setting them aside for "special circumstances." Special circumstances are when our liberties matter most, and are most in peril.

Conventional wisdom describes a "tradeoff" between liberty and security. There is no tradeoff. Laws rarely provide security. Draconic secrecy laws and public surveillance haven't protected Britain from terrorism. More importantly, any security we might gain, we lose ten times in the long run: Our freedom from tyranny is the ultimate source of our security. We are the richest and most free country in the world because we are the most open and transparent country. Please vote against legislation that trades away our freedoms for the illusion of security.

[Cantwell: I applaud your statement of 12 Sep 2001, in which you promised to "uphold the principles of liberty and justice for all."]

2. Terrorism

Many currently active terrorists, including the prime suspect in the 11 Sep attack, were trained or supported by the United States in the past. If we want fewer acts of terrorism, we should stop training and sponsoring terrorists. [McDermott: Thank you for co-sponsoring HR1810] [Murray: Thank you for co-sponsoring S.873 in 1999. Please continue to support legislation] [Cantwell: Please support new legislation] to close the taxpayer-funded School of the Americas terrorist training camp.

3. Cycle of Violence

We should carefully consider the effectiveness of sanctions and other actions that destroy a nation's people without affecting our real enemies. Let us remember that our enemies are not nations or religions, but instead those who cannot participate in global civilization as described in the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. "When you think Taliban, think Nazis. When you think Bin Laden, think Hitler. And when you think 'the people of Afghanistan' think 'the Jews in the concentration camps.' ... the Afghan people ... were the first victims of the perpetrators." [Mir Tahim Ansary]

If we must go to war, let it be with overwhelming force, but let it be followed by as much American money, and as many American workers, as are needed to rebuild a nation that can be a partner in civilization.

My family tree was partially truncated by the Holocaust. As Israel demeans itself by visiting upon the Palestineans some of the same crimes that Jews have endured throughout history, I ask you to do more to use American influence to bring restrain Israel's behavior. I ask you do more to put an end to US-sponsored terrorism. I ask you to do more to bring deliberation and restraint to the Senate.

Please. You are my voice in Congress. Speak out now, so that the next generation of history books can describe 2001 as a special year, the year the world shattered the cycle of violence. Last century was an abattoir; if we pursue the same policies, what will make this century different?

Joel Aufrecht Guilin, China 18 Sep 2001

I found the following sources especially helpful as I formulated my thoughts. (Note that I was unable, with repeated attempts over several days, to directly access washingtonpost.com, pbs.org, senate.gov, or house.gov, and suspect that these addresses may be filtered on my Internet connection. I was only able to access them by routing through my computer in Seattle, a method not available to the typical Chinese internet user.) Ansary, Mir Tahim. (14 Sep 2001). Mir Tahim Ansary on Afghanistan. Retrieved 15 Sep 2001 from http://davenet.userland.com/2001/09/14/tamimAnsaryOnAfghanistan

Barlow, John Perry. (11 Sep 2001). BarlowFriendz 7.4: Remember The Reichstag..., Retrieved 17 Sep 2001 from http://groups.yahoo.com/group/wtcattack/message/93

Foden, Giles. (13 Sep, 2001). Bin Laden: the former CIA 'client' obsessed with training pilots. The Guardian. Retrieved 17 Sep 2001 from http://www.guardian.co.uk/wtccrash/story/0,1300,551037,00.html

Stephenson, Neal. (1999) "In the Beginning ...." Retrieved 01 Sep 2001 from http://cryptonomicon.com/beginning. (Section on cultural interfaces, and the phrase "turned the last century into an abattoir")

School of the Americas Watch. http://www.soaw.org/

The Truth About The Israeli-Palestinian Conflict - The Reasons Behind Terrorism. Retrieved 17 Sep 2001 from http://www.crazynews.net/terrorism.html

Mokhiber, Russell, and Weissman, Robert. (13 Sep 2001) [corp-focus] Respond to Violence: Teach Peace, Not War. Retrieved 16 Sep 2001 from http://lists.essential.org/pipermail/corp-focus/2001/000085.html

Associated Press. (18 Sep 2001). Senate OKs Expanding Wiretap Law. Retrieved 16 Sep 2001 from http://news.findlaw.com/ap/o/1110/9-14-2001/20010914030125750.html

Greenhouse, Linda. (16 Sep 2001). The Clamor of a Free People. New York Times. Retrieved 17 Sep 2001 from http://www.nytimes.com/2001/09/16/weekinreview/16GREE.html?pagewanted=all

Kim, Eun-Kyung. (13 Sep 2001). Senate Panel OKs U.N. Nominee. Washington Post. Retrieved 16 Sep 2001 from http://www.washingtonpost.com/ac2/wp-dyn/A27474-2001Sep13?language=printer

Schneier, Bruce. (15 Sep 2001). CRYPTO-GRAM. Retrieved 16 Sep 2001 from http://www.counterpane.com/crypto-gram.html

Philipkoski, Kristen. (13 Sep 2001). Civil Liberty the Next Casualty? Wired. Retrieved 16 Sep 2001 from http://www.wired.com/news/politics/0,1283,46784,00.html

Moran, Michael. (24 Aug 1998). Bin Laden comes home to roost. MSNBC. Retrieved 16 Sep 2001 from http://www.msnbc.com/news/190144.asp